Friday, December 2, 2011

It's been awhile

The title says it all. Not to say I haven't been cooking or keeping up with life cause I most certainly have. Merely that life has gotten me a little too involved to be blogging. Keeping up with grades for my students is one thing. So is dealing with some personal issues like mental illness.

This is a wonderful time of year! There are so many things to celebrate and be grateful for. Yep I ended a sentence with a preposition even though I would never let my students do that! But this is my writing and it's not being graded so I can do what I want right? Just don't tell them that!

I spent a few weeks being obsessed with dump cakes. My husband turns out, doesn't like them. Meaning: I get to eat all the leftovers!!!! I forgot how wonderful pie filling, cake mix and two sticks of butter tastes when you bake it. That's all there is to it. Anyone can make a dump cake.

Another thing on my mind has been presents. I've decided to make sweets for people this year. I figure it can't be too hard, just time consuming is all. With my husband working Saturdays lately, that gives me plenty of time to bake and catch up on the shows I record during the week. My plan this year is to make homemade marshmallows. If you're a recipient of these, please humor me and tell me how good they are. Even if they aren't. I'm hoping they will be, and in the next few weeks I'll be documenting my attempts at making them. I'm also making hot chocolate mix. I figure that's a perfect combo and it's cheap to make. I do need to invest in a candy thermometer however. Thankfully, we got a Kitchen Aid from my grandmother for the wedding so that is a huge timesaver! That isn't the extent of the creations however. I plan to make several types of fudge, cookies and dipped pretzels. Possibly saltine candy if I can swing it. So if you live nearby, be prepared for us to drop by with some goodies. And if you don't: send me your address!

Onto the other chaos in my life. Mental illness. This is a touchy subject, but I started this blog to get out my feelings. You all happen to be the recipients. Choose to read at your own risk. People don't like to talk about it but you need to. The last few weeks, I have seen someone I love dearly face their own demons. In turn, I had to face mine. It wasn't easy, and it's not over by any means. However, I'm grateful he was able to recognize he needs more help and will be getting that help. We take it day by day and so far things are improving. I decided in this process that I have some pretty scary demons myself. Which is probably why I cook so much. It covers them up! Who wants to face their demons and weaknesses? Certainly not me. But I do know when enough is enough. And when you have to learn not to back down. I still don't consider myself a strong person. There are so many other people in this world stronger than I, but I'm learning how to express my opinions and make them count. Even when the other person may not want to hear it. Life is all about give and take. I've been on a roller coaster which is the main reason why I haven't blogged. I couldn't think straight, and I was afraid of what I would type. Didn't need you all reading and thinking I'm crazy. But I decided I don't care. If you think I'm crazy so what? I think it takes a bigger person to admit they need help and to be able to tell people around them they have mental illness and are struggling. The people who put you down and question why you would stay with someone like that? You don't need those people. I mean if there's abuse that's one thing but if the only thing wrong is mental illness, then you do what you need to. It isn't easy but I do know that on the other side of this, there will be something beautiful. As long as we both do our part!

Be ready for tomorrow to see pictures of the Christmas tree! And picture of all the materials needed for me to start baking!!!! Christmas baking frenzy here I come! If you live nearby and want to help just let me know! Always room in my kitchen for someone who wants to cook!

1 comment:

  1. It's funny where life takes us, isn't it? We all have demons we have to face head on if we ever hope to banish them. Just remember to do everything with love. Love yourself, your husband, your family, and your friends. There will be many barriers to push through but the only way you can knock them down is to hold that love tightly in your heart and keep on keepin' on. Even if you fall down or someone around you falls, it's okay. It hurts, it leaves bruises and sometimes scars but better you should treat the wounds and heal now than to wait 10, 20, or 30 years.